We're Men . . . we're manly men - remember that line from Mel Brooks, Robin Hood - Men in Tights. It makes me laugh just thinking back on that image. Most of us guys, consider ourselves as Tough and Gruff Cavemen at heart. We're manly and sexy, and that image is great out in public or with your tough guy buddies. At home that kind of behavior wears thin, really quickly.
The best relationships are a mix of caveman and sensitivity. Some of this is uncomfortable to do, and believe me . . . I'm like the pastor, preaching to the choir as I write this. But Hey! You want your woman to love you don't you?
Honey! I'm Home!
Don't come home, dragging your tired carcass through the door, and immediately start whining about, 'How tough your day was." What a complete downer . . . save a little energy, and at least 'act' excited to be home. If you change your pattern, soon those daily reunions will start to ignite some sparks and truly become exciting. Who knows where it could lead?
I have a sign in my office that says, "Kiss My Wife Every Day!" I need to be more cognizant of that. A quick peck is not really what the sign means. Most cave men guys, idea of touching is to come in and push your wife over the counter and get some dessert! Oh yeah baby, you know what I'm talkin' about! That's some great stuff, but she needs you to hold her hand and go on a walk. Come up behind her and give her a kiss on the neck and whisper, "You're the best thing that ever happened to me!" Back off and resist the urge to grab and grope, let her feel valued and know you aren't just after dessert every time you touch her.
Be Observant! Open Your Eyes!
This is a biggie, and I'm preaching to myself here, more than anyone else.
That ice cream dish in the sink, cup on the counter top, pee on the toilet seat, shaving hair in the sink, wet towel on the floor . . . common' Slob, stop being Homer Simpson. Help out a little, and stop treating her like she's your maid. Pick up after yourself, or at least try and be aware. Ever wonder why so many men complain about their wives nagging at them, Duh!!
You want to really get your woman hot and bothered? Say this, "Honey, how can I help you!" Make sure you are taking out the trash as you ask. She might just pass out from shock.
Ouch! I think someone just punched me in the guts. I promise you, I'll try that one tonight.
Man Up and Meek Down!
Defend your family and your wife. Tell that meddler to be quiet. Back up your mate, when the kids are picking on her. If some idiot is hitting on your wife - Kick his Ass to the Curb, maybe not literally, after all we don't want to be separated by being in jail. I mean get in between the idiot and your wife, make her feel protected and safe.
Being Meek is showing strength and vulnerability at the same time. Your wife needs to be needed. When you ask for her advice or opinion . . . Shut up and listen, don't interject, let your wife help you. Make her part of the decision making process, after all you know in your heart who really is the boss at home. (Not You, surprise, surprise!)
"Only a Sith, deals in absolutes," Obi Wan shouts, as he draws his light saber.
"You never do this . . . You never do that!" these are foolish fighting words. Absolutes are usually tools of the Sith, unless used correctly . . . "You never cease to amaze me!" or, "You always turn me on!" are proper examples of how to use absolutes. Now, "May the force be with you!"
Permanent, Enduring, Abiding!
Are you happy to just cruise along with the status quo? Do you want more from life, love and in your relationship? Well, she deserves more, and so do you.
Be Honest, don't tell lies, remember what you said in your wedding vows . . . well, it's time to keep them. Throw the possibility of divorce in the garbage can, where it belongs. Remember always that she is your partner for life. Don't limp along with a patched and glued together marriage.
Live life to the fullest . . . Together!