Talking With Your Partner about Peyronie's


Dealing with Peyronie's is stressful and difficult, not just for the man who is afflicted with this condition, but also for his partner, as well. I was suffering from depression, and was pretty much inconsolable for a while. It is one of those things that you just do not know if it is ever going to get better.
I was impacted very negatively by decreased self-esteem and a complete lack of sexual confidence. While this was going on with me, my wife was having to deal with my physical deformity in a very important area of our relationship. Sex was very uncomfortable and painful for both of us. Through it all she was very supportive, but obviously concerned, and I know she was a little grossed out by the strange appearance of my penis.

I hope it will help you to know, that you are not alone. Peyronie's disease is not spoken of much, and there is not a whole lot of medical research or information available. It is a relatively common condition. It is estimated that up to 10% of Caucasian men have Peyronie's disease sometime during their life. That figure comes directly from Urological surgeons that treat the condition. Unfortunately, due to the silence surrounding this disease, couples can feel isolated and often suffer in silence. That is why I decided to come out publicly and put a name and face to this terrible condition, and build this website. There is nothing to be ashamed of, and this condition does not make a man less masculine. This is a condition that is completely out of your control, and very little is known about its' causes. Peyronie's disease can come on fairly slowly, and is something you may try to ignore at first, until it becomes unavoidable. That for us was while we were on a vacation to Kauai. It seemed like suddenly it was much worse and the erections were painful.

If you are the partner of someone with Peyronie's and you are reading this. It is important for you to know that your partner is probably suffering a great deal of embarrassment and is having feelings of inadequacy.  It is important for you to talk together, about his condition and how it is affecting you. This may be a difficult subject to bring up, and he may resist having this conversation with you.  It is better to talk about the impact of this condition on your relationship, than to ignore it; after all it takes two people to have a relationship.  Having a conversation about it, could be an important first step in seeking treatment. Try to be sensitive when you approach the subject.  Men can put up a tough front, but I know from experience that during this time our ego's are very fragile.

You could begin the conversation with affirmation. “Honey, I have always enjoyed our sex life, but with what is going on right now. I think it would be a good time to talk this over with your doctor. Maybe he could help us get things back on track. I would be happy to go with you, if you want the support.” Most men would have a positive reaction and begin talking.


Marcello Mastioanni and Anna Karina in the Stranger
 I am very thankful for a loving and supportive wife. I Love her more every day and am so proud of her for the way she stood with me, through those really dark times. Good positive feelings are important for healing. Spend quality time together, and try to be creative and playful in the bed room, in spite of this condition.

Me and My Lover
Outside of the bedroom, strive to be good friends, and do things together to keep your relationship fun. Hold hands and touch in non-sexual ways to show your affection for each other. My wife loves me to cuddle with her and sit with her in the evening and share our days with each other. My advice to husbands is to cherish your wife in ways you never expressed before this condition. You might feel awkward or goofy, taking a shower with your wife and washing her hair, or sending her an email or card, telling her how much she means to you. Go for a walk in the woods and jump in puddles.  These small things are important to your relationship. If you can't remember the last time you gave her a massage or sent her flowers, then it has been way too long.

I hope that you have found the information in this website helpful toward your healing process. 

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9 comments:

  1. What was your solution? How to you fix your Peyronie's disease?

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  2. Read through the website - click on the Peyronie's Disease link in the bar above and read the articles. They are in sequential order and you just click on the link at the end of each page to continue on to the next one. You will then read what I did to treat my condition and overcome it. Thank you for your question - John

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  3. I hope I'm not too late, but I will try medicines for 6 months straight, and if nothing changes at all I will do the surgery...I'll let everyone know what happens.....

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  4. Thanks so much for your information that you are willing to share with me and thousands of other people who feel so distressed and helpless by this rare disease. It is rather obvious that this is indeed a very secretive and very under rated disease. I am trying your method out hoping for a good outcome both physically and mentally as I have allready been to a urologist and all I got from him was a bill and two pages printed off to tell me what I had and told not to worry about it there is nothing you can do about it exept for surgery
    Regards Chris.

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  5. Thank you for your kind words Chris,
    I was in the same place as you and many others and felt totally helpless until researching everything I could find about this condition. I talked about this with my wife and my sister. It was my sister that suggested to me about putting a name and face to the condition using my own experience, I wasn't sure at first but after some soul searching, I decided to go ahead and personalize something that I had no reason to be ashamed of.
    Best Wishes for a complete recovery - John Parks

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  6. quesiton john btw thanks for this site :-)
    I am trying your recommendations after seeing a urologist and starting the routine of "injections" to break up the plaque I have had six with no good results and that is quite painful.
    I have just ordered dr.s best semapeptase and acatyl L-carnitine. I have been taking fish oil for cholestorol issues for a while.
    my question during this ... should one refrain from masturbation while working on this disease?

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  7. As the partner of a man with Peyronie's I feel an immense sense of guilt each time I see his erection. We can pinpoint a specific incidence that caused his injury, and after 1 1/2 year of DMSO treatment it is marginally, if any better. I feel personally responsible for his suffering and that guilt may be more detrimental to our sexual relationship than the deformity. I have suggested he look into the injections, and his urologist has said they are not consistently helpful. You might want to address how a woman partner deals with their guilt while trying to be supportive of their partner, and working to make sure that they achieve pleasure during sexual encounters.

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  8. I read it all and thought..
    What to do..
    I have a moderate curvature but suffered the thickness of the penis .
    I am 26 years old .
    Now I communicate with a beautiful girl from France and going to meet her.
    But I'm afraid my problem spoil everything.

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    1. Peyronie's and congenital curvature, definitely mess with your emotions and self confidence. I remember a line that Jack Nicholson said in the movie, Witches of Eastwick. He told the girls that he curved to the right, and it made him appear sexy and mysterious. He used something that would make most men feel different, as something that made them wonder, "What would that feel like?"
      You may wish to begin a regimen of traction to help with the curvature and increase thickness. It really has been proven effective for many men to decrease curvature and increase girth. The Size Genetics device is medically approved and has many years of success. The X-4 extender is also an excellent choice and the price is very affordable. I have purchased both brands for comparison and would readily recommend either one.

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